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aadhi haatale chatke, mag milte bhakar...:)

Thoughts... one among many

 How is it that the way we are is a right way to be? That is really subective to your line of thinking isn't it. Actions are always as good or bad as we perceive them to be and we can safely say that we are not always a good judge of it.

I remember hearing this dialogue once about sanity and insanity. It made an impression . The line of argument was how do you make that line of discrimination between being sane and insane? You could call someone insane because he/she lives in a realm of unreality. But that is your and your perception alone. You could call something real like the shoe on your foot, but what if everyone else calls it a snake? Would you believe their reality or would you go with yours? Their reality could be as real to them as your reality to you. Then who is insane and who is sane? Do you think then that you are prefectly sane, or is it just your own perception that keeps you wanting to believe you are?

Pennies

How much does insignificance hurt someone? Everything you work for, is it to defy that objective?

Can you live with knowing nothing about you matters?...

How much of a shattered dream can you work on, how much of it can you rebuild?

Can you live with a broken part of yourself? Can you accept yourself after knowing how much of yourself you lose in disappointment?

Vision..

Vision will always divide the mere from the extraordinary. Vision , a prelude to wisdom and patience. And faith.

Lead me from darkness unto light...

The festival of lights, the festival of joy. I smiled at the irony of it. I couldn't connect at home, and the only time I did everybody seemed occupied. Didn't get a lot of calls, and I didn't make any. I stirred some tea for myself and watched my roommates get diwali packages from home. Last year, I had called everyone. This year I didn't quite feel like it and I didn't get any calls either. I put in some sugar. The last 3 months had been quite eventful, phone calls to the insurance company, fighting, yelling..all a lonely battle. Even then there wasn't a single call to ask how I was doing. I reflected on my role in this world, in the lives of the people I loved, in the lives of the people I put on a pedestal. My friends and relatives. Each day I would come home tired and exhausted, had some cooking, some studying, some random surfing. Each day I would wish someone would open the door with a smile and tell me it would be okay. There was a heartache which was growing that I couldn't explain. A need I felt then for someone to hold my hand and there was none. No one asked me if I needed help, maybe just a few kind words. I still lit my little diya everyday. All my questions were directed towards that little diya. I never thought I would forget to smile again. I only had one friend who would call me everyday and ask me how I was doing.

Today was narakchaturdashi. I wondered which demons I was facing. I poured tea for myself. The heartache still continued. I sipped my tea wondering if I was strong or just going with the flow. I shut my mind to everything and everyone. Everyone had stepped down from their pedestal. Everyone had lost the sheen. The halo was gone and what remained was my tired eyes trying to build a new vision. Looking for some light. This diwali was indeed a dark one...

Live and Learn...

Thought process is a very complicated thing. Is there any way to predict how any one person can interpret one thing? For a long time I believed in rights and wrongs. I also believed in black and white. But then who is the judge of it again? Different mindsets, different perceptions. How can what I believe is right be right for you? or rather How can what I think is wrong be right for you? How can you not see it is wrong(like I do)? The thought irritates you, doesn't it. Makes you restless...so restless you want to shake that person...

What does it mean to open your mind and dwell on the possibility that yes, each of us is different from each other. Doesn't mean it is a degree of how one is better or worse. Simply that all of us have a way of looking at things and 99 out 100 times we might not look at anything the same way.

How much understanding does that take? A pinch. Are we ready to spare that much?

No. Why?

:)

Impatience gets the better of all of us. Why won't that person see it the way I see it? or rather how dare he/she not see it my way? Am I stupid? How am I being dismissed? Temper, flaring temper.

What use is this temper? Who is it going to help? You or the person who can't see it the way you see it?

The last two years have taught me one thing. Temper doesn't get you anywhere, if anything you stand to lose. Yourself, respect for yourself.  Always more than the control you seem to lose.

But then who is a saint? Maybe losing it at the right time. There is a time and a place to unleash it.

Otherwise all you are doing is wasting yourself over nothing. How big a fool does that make you?

Does it mark your education or your ignorance?

Questions and answers....

Early morning, that rises tomorrow..fly,little fledgling,fly..

Networking sites have suddenly brought one in close quarters with people you know(or don't know) whether you like it or not. I am not sure if it is an entirely good thing, but I wouldn't call it bad either. It is an individual perspective. One way or the other they are a huge hit with teens, "young" adults and adults alike. You receive daily..even hourly updates sometimes. One wonders if this is indeed a far better way of knowing people or is that chance meeting after years and catching up over tea much better? No, I am not saying I am against it, how can I when I am on the same page. But how much of a good thing is good ?

Do you really need to be in touch with people all the time? Do you really need to know whats going on in everyone's lives? How much of yourself do you put out there? How has it changed you? Do you find yourself profile hopping? Do you enjoy the exercise? Essentially can you live without it?

Has networking and increasing social contacts improved your life, has it led to better communication ? Can you honestly say you know the other person better? Or that you have a better equation with him/her? Are you in a better place today from where you were before these sites took over?Do we need to think carefully over these...

One thing that is an unfortunate development is when sometimes(most?) technology takes over so much of your life that you forget to close your laptop, look around and breathe in life. It has become so easy to not notice the life flowing around you in so many ways because you are too involved in everything else in another world, which with due respect is still virtual..At some point, people do want to stop and do that..despite what you might think today, be assured that one day you will want to stop and do just that..live.

What does it take to keep 5 minutes aside everyday, sit in silence and enjoy being with yourself for a while? We desperately need to be in touch with ourselves, getting in touch with others can follow. Have you ever given a thought to how easily you can always resume from where you leave but the question is do you realize what you leave behind...what part of yourself you leave behind and for whom...

Is it not worth it to know yourself better and know what you are asking of yourself too. I have never really understood the great panic we throw ourselves into. The world is not running away from you, but are you running away from yourself? Slow down...take a deep breath and slow down...take it easy..

The one good thing that network updates have been relaying is that people back home, in Maharashtra, are sounding upbeat about voting, the adults are putting up messages like "go and vote" and the "young" adults put up pictures of the famous black dye on their fingers. It's a good turn I say, when responsibility feels light and good on your shoulder and you are willing to take that step. I give it a big thumbs up. India doesn't deserve the cynicism she gets . Lets just hope this is a good turn and not some illusion that people have taken a fancy for after viewing one of Rakeysh Mehra's "Live today and now" movies..well on second thought's if it is indeed a fancy, let it be nurtured and let it grow. That was the intent of the movie, that is why we need good story-tellers..

To live in hope...to nurture a dream....